Elephant in the room: Brexit is a shit idea!

Elephant in the room: Brexit is a shit idea!

By Chris Bovey

There, I said it, I pointed out the elephant in the room, if you voted for Brexit and still think it is a good idea then you are a fucking moron.

We are told that Brexit has divided the country and we must all come together to somehow fix this mess. I have no intention of enabling Brexit in any shape or form, since it’s a stupid idea that was sold to the public by a bunch of lying charlatans offering pink unicorns to the uninformed.

These people have effectively done a shit in my bed and have the audacity to suggest I help clean it up. These mendacious cunts can go fuck themselves as far as I’m concerned.

Now I don’t blame you if you were not entirely informed about the workings of the EU before the referendum. I’ve run businesses for nearly twenty years that benefit from frictionless borders and freedom of movement, so I had a good idea of how the Single Market and Customs Union works, which was also taught to me in the early 90s studying A-level economics – at a time when if you suggested leaving the EU and the Single Market, you would have been considered barking mad.

I am more clued up than most on the EU, due to a career that has involved a lot of importing and exporting both within the EU/EAA/EFTA and the rest of the world. That said, I’m happy to admit that I’d never heard of the bank passporting rights we are to lose that will see London lose its status as the financial capital of the world. The French are quite happy to oblige to move it all to Paris if we don’t want it.

Nor had I had any idea it could possibly affect medical supplies or cancer patients, even though the government confirmed if there is no deal, the UK will continue to use EU standards on medicines and clinical trials.

I’d never heard of the Euratom nuclear pact which, among other things, governs the transport of radioactive material used in cancer treatments. This is an issue deeply close to me having lost my own mother in 2017 to cancer. I’m horrified the British government could be so irresponsible to put lives and businesses at risk just to placate jingoistic imbeciles with no understanding of how life in the real world works.

The Brextards like to scream ‘project fear’, yet when ‘project fear’ is becoming ‘project reality’, even when we haven’t yet left, these obdurate twats still keep their heads buried in the sand, pretending everything will be OK with a ‘no deal’ Brexit, when it absolutely will not be OK.

Brexit pink unicorn cartoon.

Pink unicorns, job losses food & medical shortages and less money for the NHS. Hardly making Britain great. Image courtesy of www.stevecutts.com.

These clueless halfwits have called me a traitor to my country and unpatriotic, although I’m not quite sure how not wanting to destroy the economy of the nation of my birth and to keep the many rights that are afforded to me as an EU citizen is unpatriotic; quite the opposite, I should suggest.

Death threats and publication of my home address

I’ve received death threats, with my home address published on Facebook by Brexiteeers (a criminal offence) inviting people to go around and ‘pay me a visit’. Didn’t really bother me, as I didn’t take them seriously, but it did upset my partner and children, living in the same house, who are nothing to do with my vocal opinions on Social Media.

At the moment, I can log in online to any courier I have an account with, such as Parcelforce or FedEx, if I’ve sent to the same address before, I don’t even have to type it in again, since it is stored in an address book. I just have to measure the dimensions of the box, weigh it, choose a service, press print and it can be in Germany or The Netherlands or France or Sweden, etc., by the next day, depending on the service I choose. I’m in the sticks of rural Devon, if I were in London or a number of other British cities, I could even get a same day delivery service.

Sending stuff outside the EU is always a pain, I have to find the correct Customs Commodity Code Tariff, put much more information about the contents of the shipment including country of origin, print out three invoices and then wait while my customer gets frustrated as it gets stuck in US customs while they work out the import charges (or lose it).

Equally, importing from outside the EU is more complicated. I have to wait for the import duties to be worked out, pay VAT which I later reclaim. I much prefer sourcing from the EU as I can get the stock the next day. Leaving the Customs Union will create cashflow issues, as I’ll have to pay the VAT upfront for everything and then claim it back, and same for my European customers who buy from me. Whereas currently I just have to supply my VAT number and the charge is waived (providing the transaction is with an EU company with a valid  VAT number, which is put on the invoice). I cannot imagine my business is unique in that respect and many will have their cashflow disrupted if they will have to pay upfront 20% VAT for any goods imported from the EU, even if they can ultimately claim it back.

I cannot think of anything positive from leaving the EU. I don’t give a shit what colour my passport is and, in any case, there is no EU regulation requiring passports to be blue. I do give a shit if I will have to wait longer in the queue at passport control when I arrive at my destination airport after a long day’s travel.

‘Fuck off and live in the EU’

Swivel-eyed little Englanders have told me I should ‘fuck off and live in the EU if I love it so much’. Asides from the insult of being told by a moron to leave the nation of my birth because I’m not fucking bonkers, thanks to the idiotic Brexit vote, if we proceed with this insanity, I will not be so easily able to move to another EU/ EEA member state, since leaving the EU means losing our right to free movement regardless of the fact that studies show migration brings a net benefit to this country. This might not bother the racist thickos who voted Brexit, but I’m very fucking angry about this, not only because they are taking a right I have always taken for granted away from me, but also, they are taking it away from my children.

In any case, I already do live in the EU, as do the idiots who have suggested I ‘fuck off and live there’.

It’s not uncommon to see a young Brit working in a restaurant or bar abroad on the continent where they are experiencing a new culture and learning a new language. A friend of mine is an English language teacher in Spain. He told me his boss said he rarely employs Australians or North Americans, as the paperwork is too much and sadly after Brexit, he will just employ people mainly from the Republic of Ireland.

A thick Sun reader who seldom ventures further than his or her own nose may have no problem with this (although they might when they realise they can only bring back 10 packets of fags and small amount of wine, beer and spirits), yet why should my children, from the generation that least wants to proceed with Brexit, have such opportunities in life stripped from them?

Damaging UK science and innovation

Check out Scientists for EU, a team of scientists that campaign for Britain to remain in the EU. They have alerted the government of the disastrous consequences of leaving the EU for British science, but like any concerns from Remainers or business leaders, they are glibly dismissed by our out-of-touch dogmatic far-right government of fools.

Union Jack coloured poo with caption: Theresa May finally reveals her Brexit strategy.

Theresa May’s red, white & blue Brexit turd.

Theresa May’s botched Brexit deal is the best we will get from the EU. Some hardcore Brexiters have correctly stated it’s worse than remaining in the EU with our current arrangement, because even they recognise it will lead to the UK being rule takers, not rule makers. May’s awful deal actually gives away British sovereignty, as it means the UK would be subject to laws it has no say in shaping or proposing. The alternative, a ‘no deal’ Brexit, would be so bad it doesn’t even bear thinking about. No doubt that’s why the government are trying to scare MPs into supporting May’s crap deal with their empty threat of a ‘no deal’ Brexit, which the government’s own reports they tried so hard to stop us from seeing concluded would be catastrophic for Britain. Actually, they concluded all scenarios, including May’s shitty deal, would damage the UK’s economy and the best option would be not to leave the European Union.

So, food shortages, labour shortages, medical shortages, price rises, job losses, currency crashing, recession, economic uncertainty … I don’t recall them writing any of that on the side of their fucking red bus.

People’s Vote

Due to changes in voter demographics, i.e., elderly people more likely to be in favour of Brexit dying off the electoral register and being replaced by new younger voters who are more inclined to wish to remain in the EU, coupled with the fact that many people have changed their mind, the logical approach for our MPs would be to call a People’s Vote to see if the UK really does want to commit such an act of deliberate self-harm.

Let’s leave aside all the arguments about lying, cheating, foreign interference, law-breaking etc., in the conduct of the referendum and accept, for sake of argument, that as of June 2016, the decision to leave the EU was (marginally) the ‘will of the people’.

Two things have happened since. Firstly, anyone with half a brain who has been following events should know an awful lot more than in June 2016 and, secondly, what is ‘the will of the people’ now?

‘The People’ as of June 2016 no longer exist. Many have died and over 2 million have come of age. So, what is the will of this new ‘The People’? The only way to make a genuine, democratic decision is to ask ‘The People’ if they want May’s deal with also the option to remain on the ballot paper.

Chris Bovey takes a selfie sticking his middle finger up at David Cameron while in fancy dress as an Arab to protest at the selling of British weapons to Saudi Arabia.

I took a selfie sticking my middle finger up at Cameron on the night of his election victory that was broadcast live to millions, but I still voted Remain.

Yes, I know the racists, xenophobes, bigots, thickos and tax-dodging billionaires will still vote to leave the EU, but they are in the minority. They are beyond help. Not every person who voted Leave was an ignorant bigot, many merely fell for the lies published in the right-wing press (owned by tax-dodging billionaires who don’t like the EU’s forthcoming tax avoidance directive).

The notion that areas like Sunderland which voted heavily to leave would not return a Labour MP if Jeremy Corbyn started to oppose Brexit is absurd, they would elect a hat stand if you put a red rosette on it in that part of the country. Many of them probably only voted Leave to stick a middle finger up at the pig fucker who was so insistent the country voted to remain in the EU and then fucked off the day after the referendum when the vote went the other way. In any case, research shows that over 100 constituencies have changed their minds and most Labour voters want us to stay in the EU.

On the other hand, Labour stands to lose a lot more votes in affluent areas that voted Remain, if they back the Tory Brexit.

It’s time for honesty and truth in the Brexit debate. The claim that another referendum would be a betrayal to democracy is ridiculous beyond belief and the reason Brextards do not want another vote is that they know darn well they would lose. Hardly democratic to deny the country a vote on something because one side thinks it will not win, as they won’t be able to sell the same lies twice. That’s the opposite of democracy, it’s fascism.

It’s time to start pointing out the elephant in the room. Someone has to do it. If you still believe leaving the EU is a good idea that will be beneficial for the UK then you are a fuckwit. I don’t give a shit if I offend anybody by saying that, as the opinion polls are consistently showing Brits would vote to remain in the EU if they dared to put it to a second vote. We’ve won the arguments, the Brexiters have lost the debate, bring on a People’s Vote so they can lose that too.

“If someone tells me that I've hurt their feelings, I say, 'I'm still waiting to hear what your point is.' In this country, I've been told, 'That's offensive' as if those two words constitute an argument or a comment. Not to me they don't. And I'm not running for anything, so I don't have to pretend to like people when I don't.” - Christopher Hitchens quote.

I’ll end this with a quote from my hero, the late Christopher Hitchens.


Chris Bovey, writer and musician.

Chris Bovey is a businessman, writer, musician and practical joker. He lives in Devon with his partner, two children and cat.

Cheap and nasty policing - PCSOs demand more powers
Why the Yellow Vests needs the GREENest of New Deals.